My website hasn't been updated in years. That's pathetic. Looking at my own site I feel like an archeologist, digging thru the layers of dirt.. looking for clues about the day to day life of some goofy, self-obsessed/loathing jackass.

So far, I've noticed two things: First, I stopped posting stuff here around the same time I jumped onto MySpace. Second: This site is crap. It's not throwing weird, unexplained errors every time you click on something.. but it needs work. I guess this message is like those notes from Tom saying, "MySpace is NOT closing down! We're NOT going to start charging! The rumor that we're just here to catalog information about the Jews is NOT TRUE!!"

ChadRiden.com is NOT closing down! We're NOT going to start charging! The rumor that we're just here to catalog information about the Jews is.. well, ok.. that one's true. You got me.

I think being a computer dork is a lot like being a mechanic. My brother Eric is a master mechanic - he's certified in and can fix everything.. but his car is a total piece of crap and he's been "working" on an engine rebuild project for my '83 Coupe DeVille for about 10 years. It's not really his fault, the guy is friggin busy.. and when you put in 10-12 hours a day busting your knuckles underneath other ass-clown's cars you don't want to use your one day off to go do the same crap. No, you want to drink like you're partying with Lindsay Lohan and play Everquest2 until you pass out. At least, he does.. and I don't blame him.

I've spent the last seven years in Nashville doing nerdy computer crap all day and comedy most nights. As a result, my personal website looks nearly as neglected as my family feels! There's nothing new here and the old stuff isn't all that great. My office in my basement appears to be the final resting place where old school Apple products go to die. Looking around me, I see nine Mac's, three Newtons, two Apple //e's and boxes of disks and parts. This is no different than the junkyard at my parents' house full of Cadillacs, Jeeps and ghetto sleds. Except nobody occasionally crawls into that mess to jerk off.. at least not since I moved away. I've digressed.

My point is, my site is cluttered with old crap I don't need. I'll try to fix it soon-ish.

The big news is.. I no longer have a day job at all. I'm finally doing stand-up full time and doing nerd shit on the side instead of the other way around. Go see my schedule on MySpace, and come see a show.. and if you need web / graphics / video production stuff done, visit my nerd page. If you'd like to see what happens when comedy and nerdery collide, visit: ComedyPodcast.com, NashvilleStandUp.com, ScreechSucks.com & MangyDog.com.

For more timely updates than once every two years, add me on MySpace or join my mailing list:

LAUGHTER IS THE BEST MEDICINE
There's at least one thing about this "beat the post-holiday blues" get-together guaranteed to lift one's spirits: admission is free. But the music and comedy look pretty promising, too. The humor is provided by talented comics Tim Northern, Chad Riden, Jesse Perry and Danny Limor. The live music features vibraphonist Bruce White, Rod Wayne & The Magics, the funk/hip-hop ensemble Verbena Court Strut Band and the '40s-era retro stylings of John ("Big Daddy Cool") Pyka & The Swing Kittens. You're supposed to dress up nice for this affair, which happens 6 p.m. Dec. 28 at TPAC's Polk Theater. For more information, phone 782-4000. -Martin Brady

CHAD RIDEN
One of Nashville's staunchest promoters of comedy, Riden is also a pretty funny guy in his own right. His aggressive, angry-young-man stance of a few years ago has been leavened somewhat, since Riden more recently entered the world of marriage and fatherhood. His observations on the domestic sphere teeter amiably on the edge, but when he wants to, Riden can still zing pop culture, the media and American life in general with incisive wit. His Nov. 20 appearance at Hair of the Dog will be recorded as potential material for a new CD. Riden takes the stage at 8:30 p.m. For information, call 386-3311 or visit www.NashvilleStandUp.com. -Martin Brady

MOCK THE VOTE
Nashville's stand-up comedy community won't let the forthcoming election stand in the way of a good time. In fact, they'll even find ways to exploit the event with this Nov. 2 extravaganza, as local comics take potshots at the candidates, the media and everyone else within range. Cast your vote, then head over to the Bar Car in Cummins Station, where wags like Chad Riden, Jesse Perry, Mark Anundson and Craig Smith will tell jokes, perform sketches, dole out door prizes and keep their audience updated on election returns. The fun begins at 8 p.m. For show info, phone 300-1550. —Martin Brady

Craig Smith and Chad Riden, two Nashville Comics who often drive all the way to Chattanooga simply to perform—for nothing—at Buckwild, often bring their notebooks or pieces of scrap paper up on stage with them as they test their material.

"Chad Riden writes...

Boy, I wish somebody would thank the Academy. They're always the unsung heroes of the Oscars.

Go to your room, Chad."

But are police officers funny?

"When I think of cops, I don't think of wacky fun," said comedian Chad Riden, 28, from Nashville, Tenn. That changed when Riden met Dan Whitehurst, 41, a detective for the Nashville Police Department who won the competition in 2001. Riden learned the detective, now a friend, had a gift for humor.

In the mood for something really funny? Check out Chad Riden's original humour, & make sure you listen to his set at The Fiddle and Steel Guitar Bar. Sounds like a real Silly Dude!